I have been goin thru some changes for some time now. I have been thinking about how fat I have gotten and I am not happy. I have reached an all time low self esteem wise. Last night I was looking at old photos of myself 10years ago. I was hot...but now I'm not! Problem is that I don't like my life the way it is but I feel paralyzed and stuck in this nightmare. I gotta get myself out of this rut that I have been in for at least 8 years. What am I gonna do? The answer is change. I only wish change was not such a difficult thing to do. I wish I could afford a trainer or coach but I can not so I have to do it all on my owns. Tomorrow I plan to do water aerobics. Hopefully by next week I'll be doing sprints. I got a family reunion to attend in June, a wedding in August, and I got to look good when I visit my prison love ministry any day now.
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